Paper Gangsta Chicken

Every once in a while, Richie gets really hungry, and decides we need to get back to some semblance of living in a civilized society and eat a full meal for dinner instead of sitting on his bedroom floor eating leftover soup (which we did on Monday). Yesterday was one of those days.

Over time, these "full meals" have come to include these basic components:

• Spinach- Hot olive oil and garlic in a pan, add lots and lots of spinach, allow to wilt. Deliciously simple. An alternative here is stuffed mushrooms or asparagus, but spinach is easier and doesn't take up room in my tiny oven. Richie makes this part.
• Stove Top stuffing- Chicken flavor. No exceptions.
• Biscuits- Typically the Grands layers, but it varies.
• Mozzarella cheese- A perfect appetizer. Just slice pieces off the ball of cheese and consume.
• Some sort of chicken.

The chicken is almost always my responsibility, and it's always a pain. Since I don't eat almost any other kind of meat (and fish is wicked expensive!) chicken is my go-to protein. I usually just end up breading, pan-frying, and baking it with sauce and/or cheese. Simple, and always good. But I'm getting sick of the same old thing, and I guess Richie was too. So he came up with a brilliant idea: "Do you have shredded cheese? What if you mixed the shredded cheese with the breadcrumbs?"

Glorious. I couldn't believe I hadn't thought of it myself. Fried cheese is one of the best things in the world. I'd tried it with parmesan with good results, but I had just never thought of the shredded cheese.

So, long story short, it was delicious. And all delicious new meals deserve their own name. So it was decided (for reasons that still elude me somewhat- I think it has something to do with the fact that it's really simple and there aren't any ingredients that wouldn't already be in your fridge) that it shall be known as "Paper Gangsta Chicken", after the song by the magical Lady Gaga.

So here, for the very first time, is the extremely simple and extremely delicious recipe for the extremely unhealthy Paper Gangsta Chicken:

Ingredients:

• 2 boneless, skinless chicken breasts
• breadcrumbs and assorted breadcrumb seasonings- this time I used Italian seasoning, garlic salt, and a little bit of cinnamon
• a spoonful of mayo
• a handful of shredded cheese
• olive oil

Prep:

• Make sure your hands are clean (I know, this is obvious, but I still feel like I should put it, just in case someone doesn't know the basic laws of cooking).
• Put the mayo in a bowl. Throw the chicken in the bowl. Mush it all together until the chicken breasts are relatively evenly coated with mayo.

Side note: I know that mayo is not

absolutely necessary, but I think it's

really helpful, especially when working

with a heavier coating like the cheese.

And you're already eating fried chicken

with cheese. You're not being healthy.

Don't kid yourself into thinking that

excluding the mayo is going to save

your diet.

• In another bowl, you should have mixed your breadcrumbs, seasoning, and cheese. Put your chicken in this bowl and coat them with the mixture.
• Pan-fry in hot olive oil.
• Place in glass dish and bake at 350 for a while (typically this is just until the biscuits are done baking). Throw some cheese on the top, too, if you're feeling especially deprived of clogs in your arteries. Serves 2.

The best thing about this chicken is that when you're pan-frying it, the cheese doesn't have time to get gooey (make sure that oil is hot before you put the chicken in), so it just gets crunchy and delicious.